Misconception

In life, we go through whole heap of crap before we die out in peace. The ups and downs of life, we climb, we slide. No doubt we seek for a hand from friends from time to time. People often assume comfort to be an end itself, reality is it can only be a means. Words of comfort freeze you in space and time.

I failed my work experience. In a way it’s a relief, in the sense that I have proven my incapability to work with children to the world. Though if that is the truth then that is just silly.

Never do we give up for anything less

It’s true, the feelings are stronger each time. We never give up or let go on our last affair for anything less. The more in love we are, the more difficult it will be to find one we’ll fall stronger for.

He finally appeared to take V’s place. I was told he has a girlfriend the first day I met him. A long time ago, I never thought that something like that would matter as long as I knew and I came along second. But the truth was it did turn me off by a bit in the same way as knowing we’ll never have a chance. Just like I am incapable of falling for someone 20-years into my senior, but regardless of how attractive they are my mind doesn’t even go there if the person is over 50 or 40. Because when someone is over 40, it just seems like we’ll never have a chance and what is the point?

It’s also true once you get to a certain age you stop dating for fun, you date for marriage. Dating gets tiring. After all the pain that each round brings, you just want to stop and be secured by something that does not end. Just back on that point again, sometimes it’s not really an age thing. After a broken heart, you realise the seriousness of an affair. Hearts are not to be played; hearts are to be cared for. It can only be considered immoral to play hearts in the way anyone did.

As I walked back from my run tonight, a question hit me: Is it harder to care about someone you don’t care about, or is it harder pretending not to care about someone you do?

Lingers on...

Why?! Time after time I fight it off, yet time after time I hold on. He names appears on my Window Live messenger again. Part of me still believes we have a chance. It is that part of me that want to sign in and test it out. It is that part that is so afraid to test it out. It is that part that is so keen to know for sure.
It is that part of me that decided we’ll never have a chance again, because of all the lying peices on the ground.